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Alexia’s Legacy: Create Time for Family and Friends, Even in the Middle of Chaos

She was tragically taken from us, but her legacy lives on.  Every few weeks we will share excerpts from the book.

 

Ray,        

So today I got a lot of little things done for my classes. It was A LOT of reading! I also had some time to get some little household type chores done, take some me time, and get some exercising in.

This evening for me was overtaken by RA things. I spent two hours working through a harassment situation for one of the residents and finished that up just in time to run to get ready for our fire drill. Those events pushed back my plans to go see a movie with friends. Although later than planned, we did still go which was a nice change of pace after the heavy topics that filled this evening! I’m now exhausted and heading off to bed! Talk to you soon!

Alexia

 

Ray,

Today I drove home to Houston, spent some time with friends, and now am writing in my journals and headed to bed!

Alexia

 

Ray,

Today mom and I had a relaxing girls day bumming around town. I also ran around playing with my dog for quite a while today for some exercise! I have written in my journals and mom and I are now watching a movie while we lay in bed to fall asleep.

Alexia

 

Ray,

Today I relaxed and spent more time with my mom and got some exercise in, and I am now getting ready to do my journals and head to bed!

Alexia

 

Ray,

Today was, over all, a pretty good day! I played volleyball intramurals tonight and it was so much fun! I just finished a quiz and packing for this weekend’s trip! I can’t wait to catch you up on all of the PLP recent events as well as RA! See you Monday!

Alexia

 

Hi Ray!

This long weekend was much needed! I spent some time with family/friends, catching up on my rest, and being productive. It was a good mix and I feel a lot better going into this week!

Thanks and talk to you soon!

Alexia

 

Ray,

I had some fun play time after a department meeting with McKesson and I had some great friends time tonight to help vent a bit and help mentally relieve some stress which was awesome! I did my journals and am now headed to bed!  Talk to you soon,

Alexia

 

Lesson: Create time for family and friends, even in the middle of chaos.

Make time for family and friends. Don’t let the chaos of life derail those plans. The people in your best relationships are understanding and supportive, and therefore easier to blow off. But those relationships are also the most important things in your life and a key to your success and happiness. Every now and then, the chaos of life will interfere with your time with those important people. But don’t let it postpone those visits indefinitely. Make sure they happen on a regular basis and you get your needed energy boost and support from your best relationships. More importantly, you need your opportunity to give back to those relationships, as it will make both you and the relationship stronger. As a leader you need confidence, energy, and diverse opinions you can count on. Those all come from your positive relationships. Make time to nurture your important relationships, especially in the middle of chaos.

Opportunity: Make a list of your most important relationships. Reach out and schedule time with them today.

 

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My Passion is helping people become successful and happy. I have found that many people want to be successful but just don’t know how. More importantly, people want to be successful because they feel that reaching some success pinnacle will result in them becoming happy. The research and my experience has shown that just the opposite is the case. Success does not lead to happiness. Happiness leads to success.

Time Prioritization

How to Take Control of Your Busy Life

Create a new relationship with time.

We are all leading busy lives and unfortunately it seems that they are getting busier each day. No matter what we seem to accomplish our list at the end of the day seems longer than the list we started with. If we answer 5 emails, there are 10 more to take their place. If we help one client, 3 more need something else. If we handle one family crisis, three more pop up.

So how do we handle all of this and feel good about what we accomplish at the end of the day?

The answer is in changing our relationship with time. Instead of trying to grab and hold on to time, or wish for a little more time, we can accept and make the most of the time we are given, and even learn to appreciate that time.

Let’s start with the understanding that there are only 24 hours in a day and we can’t steal more hours from anyone or anything. So how do we want to allocate our 24 hours?   If we can accept that we can’t do everything, then we have to decide what we will do and what we want to do.

So let’s start with work. There are 24 hours in a day. Are you going to spend all 24 hours working? The answer is of course not. So then how many hours are you going to spend working? 16, 12, 10, 8? Pick a number. Let’s use 10 hours as an example. Now take control of time by understanding you are going to work 10 hours per day. So what you have to do is get everything done in that 10 hours. Rather than believing you can add 2 hours here or 2 hours there, understand you only have 10 hours to work and after that 10 hours is done you stop working and do something else.

A common response is, “I can’t stop working, I have to get it all done.” To take control of time, you have to recognize that you can never get it all done. You have to choose the most important items and make sure those get done.

So let’s talk about prioritization. If you only have 10 hours and you can’t add hours, then what do you have to get done in those 10 hours. Make a list of what you have to get done, and give everything a number from 1 to 100. 100 is your most important task and 1 is your least important task. There can be no duplicate numbers. You have to decide which items are the most important. See blog on $100 rocks for more detail.

Now you have a list, start with your biggest rock, the 100 priority, and get that done first thing. You may be able to complete the entire project or just take a small step, but do something to move forward on your 100 priority. Then start your 99 priority, then your 98 priority.   Now we know you will not get to everything on your list, but if you can get the top 3 done every day, then you will be adding value at work each day. You can probably also move the top 3 forward in about 2 hours each day, which gives you the next 8 hours to work on other things with the confidence that you have already added your value for the day. Which also means, after 10 hours, you will be able to go home and take on the other phases of your life.

Let’s address some of the non-work phases of your life. Let’s start with sleep. When we get busy, and even sometimes when we are not busy, the first thing we tend to sacrifice is our sleep. Even just small amounts of sleep deprivation can cause irritability, lower your resistance to stress, and reduce your feelings of general healthiness. Lack of sleep also reduces your productivity and cognitive performance. Your brain categorizes what you learned the day before while you are sleeping, so a lack of sleep impacts your recall and ability to quickly solve problems. Most people need at least 7 hours of sleep per night to function at optimal levels. Don’t steal hours from your sleep.

The good news is with 7 hours of sleep and 10 hours of work, you still have 7 hours left in each day for a total of 35 hours on weekdays and another 34 hours on the weekend for a total of 69 hours each week. How do you want to spend that other 69 hours?

You probably need to allocate time for meals and/or spending time with children. You can build relationships by calling a different family member each day on the way into work. You can exercise for 30 minutes 3 or 4 times a week. You can listen to music or a book on your commute home from work. You can schedule 4 or 5 dinners a week with your family or friends. Try spending 30 minutes each day taking a walk with your dog, spouse, girlfriend or boyfriend. Try spending 2 minutes each day being grateful for what you have or remember what was good about the day.

Don’t schedule every minute of every day. You need room to handle the unexpected and unplanned activities. Focus on getting a few important things done and then filling in your time with everything else.

Create a new relationship with time. Take control of it, instead of letting it slip away from you.

 

 

 

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About 

My Passion is helping people become successful and happy. I have found that many people want to be successful but just don’t know how. More importantly, people want to be successful because they feel that reaching some success pinnacle will result in them becoming happy. The research and my experience has shown that just the opposite is the case. Success does not lead to happiness. Happiness leads to success.

 

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